Alexei Auld is back with a brand new book available 7 Secret Sources of Inspiration: A Snappy Guide for Creative Procrastinators to grill Eugene S. Robinson (who’s pushing a GoFundMe to pay for the new Oxbow album) and myself with some PR stumpers from the world of combat sports.
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Today’s puzzlers include:
- You’re the UFC. According to ESPN, you are in ‘advanced talks’ to sell your promotion. How does this affect your PR strategy?
- You’re Floyd Mayweather. With the UFC emphatically denying rumors you started that Conor McGregor is available for a boxing bout, do you lobby the US congress to extend the Muhammad Ali act to MMA or do you not need that to book Conor in a boxing match?
- You’re Ronda Rousey. How do you spin Paige VanZant’s TMZ statement confirming Miesha Tate’s tea on Joe Rogan: “It appears that I offended Ronda by congratulating Holly after her victory. The incident was very shocking and totally unnecessary.”
- You’re J-Lo. After Beyonce blew up with a feminist angle, you tried swagger jacking her steez with “Ain’t Your Mama” in April, and received more press for being produced by alleged rapist Dr. Luke. So you followed up last Friday with a video including Gloria Steinem and Hillary Clinton quotes, but lacking that hot sauce seen in “Formation” or “Lemonade”. What PR moves can you make to continue your quest for relevancy instead of becoming a 21st century version of Pat Boone?
- You’re Brazilian soccer legend Rivaldo. Yesterday, you released a statement advising ‘everyone with plans to visit Brazil for the Olympics in Rio â to stay home. You’ll be putting your life at risk here. This is without even speaking about the state of public hospitals and all the Brazilian political mess.’ Since you’re one of my boys from Brazil, break it down before I buy my plane tickets.
- You’re rapper Azealia Banks. Are you legitimately backing Donald Trump for president, or is this some silent Sarah Palin settlement stuff?
- CURVEBALL (KEEPING IT UNDER WRAPS)
- TEACHABLE MOMENT: You’re a current Penn State University President Eric Barron. You dissed and dismissed new allegations that beloved football coach Joe Paterno knew his former assistant coach and convicted child molester Jerry Sandusky engaged in sexual abuse twenty-five years earlier than JoePa originally claimed. After the media pounced, the University confirmed an older timeline and that ninety million dollars had been doled out to settle over thirty civil claims from Sandusky’s accusers. Was this part of the PR plan? And what public and private moves can you make to protect your brand?
- EUGENE’S LOST BATTALION/PHANTOM TOLLBOOTH
Enjoy!