So! You fancy yourself a hardcore fight fan? Prove it by powering (gritting your teeth) through the meticulous (meandering) fight analysis (random words) in this week’s MMA Vivisection, which centers around Saturday’s UFC Fight Night: Bader vs. Saint Preux event.
Industry standards and common sense indicate that any video exceeding an hour’s length becomes a futile attempt from the perspective of engaging the viewers. However, many of our esteemed brethren from the Bloody Elbow community have encouraged us to transcend the wicked boundaries of timeliness by speaking our minds freely and without constraint. So we did — meaning it’s your fault if this show sucks. If you’d prefer to bypass the mindless chatter and immerse yourself directly in the no-nonsense fight analysis, simply fast-forward to …. well, to next week’s show, you tractable sheep.
After all, what is time? Time has no meaning. It’s an illusion; an abstract concept that sundial, clock and watch companies have duped our society into conforming to. So kiss our collective asses, Quartz and Timex! And you, the empowered, strong-willed and free-thinking readers, should be insulted by this tyrannical hour-long-max guideline, which implies that the MMA audience has the attention span of an absent minded grade-schooler. Prove these unconstitutional field studies wrong by demonstrating your ability to stay fixated on one particular topic for as long as … oh man! My cat does some funny shit sometimes.
Superceding the aforementioned drivel is the imperative necessity to subscribe to the MMA Nation channel on Youtube, where you are also welcome to watch the Vivisection. The full Bader vs. St. Preux lineup follows.
Main Card (Fox Sports 1 at 10:00 p.m. ET)
Ryan Bader vs. Ovince Saint Preux
Gray Maynard vs. Ross Pearson
Tim Boetsch vs. Brad Tavares
Seth Baczynski vs. Alan Jouban
Shawn Jordan vs. Jack May
Robbie Peralta vs. Thiago Tavares
Preliminary Card (Fox Sports 2 at 8:00 p.m. ET)
Jussier Formiga vs. Zach Makovsky
Sara McMann vs. Lauren Murphy
Sam Alvey vs. Tom Watson
Frankie Saenz vs. Nolan Ticman
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